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My Core Values:
Accessibility: Financial obstacles will never be the reason that people who want to work with me aren't able to.
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Empowerment: We start off as victims, but we don’t have to stay there.
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Empathy: I stive to always meet my clients where they are.
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Relatable/Relational: “I see you.”
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Evolving: My life-long learning mentality transfers to the information, tools, and experiences I bring to my work and clients.
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Safety: The foundation of all that I do - as I view experiences from a trauma-informed perspective, the space I provide my clients is based on Phase 1 of the APSATS model: safety and stability.
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Curiosity: In my work I suspend all judgment - the curious why is our door to new self-discovery, and powerful shifts in our lives.
After 10 years of DECONSTRUCTING GASLIGHTING™ and thousands of hours of coaching clients, I have found a proven method to help others find, and live in, that place of freedom that comes from knowing, and being able to stay connected to, your authentic self. That method is my E3 Signature Process!
Here's a snapshot...​
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I love My Analogies!
(The Story of My "E3" Methodology)
In my DECONSTRUCTING GASLIGHTING™ AWARENESS VIDEO COURSE, I introduce an analogy that is pivotal to understanding not only how gaslighting is experienced, but also both the journey AND end game my clients are meant to arrive at.
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I refer to it over and over in the work that I do: my "Archer and Target" analogy!
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And I'm going to use it today to explain my E3 Methodology!
To set the stage, this is the premise of the analogy:
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The archer, of course, is the person doing the GASLIGHTING behavior; the "gaslightee (or person on the receiving end of the GASLIGHTING behavior) is the target.
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MOST OF US, until we find the word, "GASLIGHTING", are basically walking around with arrows sticking out of us, and WE DON'T EVEN KNOW IT!
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Allow me to take you through my E3 Process through the lens of this analogy...
My "E3" Methodology:
What it is &
Why the Order is SO Important!
Each "E" in my signature process represents movement through my "Archer & Target" analogy; a phase of healing and growth:
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PHASE 1 = EDUCATION
PHASE 2 = EMPOWERMENT
PHASE 3 = EMBODIMENT
When you are building something to last, you build in order, with each phase setting up the next phase for success! This is how my E3 process works!
E1 - EDUCATION:
EDUCATION is defined as the act or process of imparting or acquiring general knowledge, developing the powers of reasoning and judgment, and generally of preparing oneself or others intellectually for mature life. For the purpose of the E3 journey, education is mainly about two things:
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My perspective of what GASLIGHTING is
There are so many different understandings and ways that people work with There are so many different understandings of this concept, so it's incredibly important that I define my perspective of GASLIGHTING. There is also a multitude of ways in which professionals might work with GASLIGHTING, so this is where I explain my professional approach to working with my clients.
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Introduction to GASLIGHTING
This is where you will get a thorough introduction to the topic of GASLIGHTING in multiple ways and from a variety of perspectives and experiences. This allows your awareness to grow and develop - and you will likely experience some pretty big "a-ha!" moments during this important phase. I hear it all the time!
In my analogy, this is where we learn:
To recognize that there is a "field of battle", "archer", and "target" as you learn to understand what makes an experience GASLIGHTING.
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To recognize when we are being "hit by the arrows" as you gain the ability to identify and understand the effect that GASLIGHTING can have on you.
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That not all archers are the same, and what tools you can use to stop getting hit by the arrows and how to minimize becoming a potential target in the future.
E2 - EMPOWERMENT:
EMPOWERMENT is defined as the process of becoming stronger and more confident, especially in controlling one's life and claiming one's rights. For the purpose of the E3 journey, empowerment is mainly about two things:
Deepen your understanding
I am here for so much more than simply educating you on the concept of GASLIGHTING, and when to recognize when it's happening to you. My end game is to provide you with the tools you need to NAVIGATE it in a healthy way. This phase is where we build on the foundational information you learned in Phase 1, so you can truly understand all the moving parts of a gaslighting experience. Why? Because GASLIGHTING is tricky, complex, manipulative, and sometimes it can be so subtle that you really start to question yourself and your sanity! I will help you break through the fog of confusion so you are informed, confident, and ready to deal with any GASLIGHTING that comes your way.
Tools, Tools, and more Tools!
And we're not just talking about your gaslighter/exes here (ha!). Empowerment comes from learning, practicing, and mastering TOOLS so you can use them over and over again. This will shift the power from external/others-centered power to internal/authentic-self-centered power (I often use the phrase, "Our place of authentic power is...") This phase is where you will begin to really step into your authentic power!
In my analogy, this is where we learn:
An in-depth understanding of the "Archer" and their "Arrows" as we deconstruct the methods, techniques, tactics, and roles a gaslighter uses.
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Deeper insight into how we take on the role of the "Target" as we identify and decode the things that make us vulnerable to GASLIGHTING, what traps we tend to fall in to, and the various patterns that have developed throughout our lives and relationships thus far.
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How to avoid the Arrows! Once we can recognize the archer and their arrows, and understand what makes us a target, we can learn to side-step the arrows, or even completely move out of range - aka get the hell out of there!
E3 - EMBODIMENT:
FOR EMBODIMENT, I'm using the definition of one of it's synonyms, assimilate, which means to take in and incorporate AS ONE'S OWN. For the purpose of the E3 journey, embodiment is mainly about two things:
Everything You've Learned Becomes Fully Ingrained
Embodiment is about moving beyond Education and Empowerment - this is the phase where you EMBODY these teachings. Understanding GASLIGHTING is crucial, as is learning how to use the tools you learn and keep in your mind as something you can access when needed. But EMBODIMENT happens when the information, principles, and tools become PART OF YOU. That's right - YOUR NEW NORMAL is an empowered and self-trustworthy place of living!
Learning To Love and Trust Yourself
This phase is where you move into truly KNOWING YOURSELF, free from GASLIGHTING. And when you know yourself, THAT is when you begin LOVING YOURSELF. And when you love yourself, that is when you refuse to self-abandon and can really settle into TRUSTING YOURSELF.
In my analogy, this is where we learn:
To shed the Target identity altogether as you connect with and OWN your core values with clarity and certainty.
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How to live from a place where the arrows can't even reach you anymore. This phase is where you no longer have to worry about avoiding the arrows because you're no longer in the line of fire. How is that?? Because you've learned to use your values to define your boundaries and implement solid boundary requests with actionable responses when they aren't honored.
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That when we OWN our values and boundaries, no matter when or where we find ourselves back on any field where there is an "archer", we know ourselves and trust ourselves to not become a target - EVER AGAIN!
ARE YOU READY TO BREAK FREE OF GASLIGHTING AND CHANGE YOUR LIFE?
DECONSTRUCTING GASLIGHTING™
1:1 PRIVATE COACHING
1:1 sessions are for you if you:
Want individual & guidance from me on your specific situation
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Would feel more comfortable in a private setting versus a group or self-study setting
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Looking for coaching to help you brainstorm solutions to your GASLIGHTING situation
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You would prefer a custom approach to my E1-E3 teachings
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You are ready for a complete transformation in your life, free from GASLIGHTING
Limited number of spaces available!
Schedule a FREE 15-minute consultation to see if Private Coaching is right now for you.
Work With Me to Get These Results...
Insight:
Your ability to have an accurate and deep intuitive understanding of yourself and the world around you.
How would your daily decisions and interactions be affected if you were confident in your insight?
Self-Worth:
Your connection to self-worth as you discover all the wonder inside of you.
How different would it feel if you were able to live from a place of knowing you're worthy of the things you desire?
Self-Love:
Your WHOLENESS, and with it, a deep self love.
How would you show up in the different areas of your life, if you were rooted in loving yourself well, and requiring others to do the same?
Authentic Power:
Your clarity around your personal limits, and what keeps you in alignment with your authentic self.
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What changes would happen in your life if you refused to take on anything that takes you out of your integrity?
Self-trust:
Your belief in YOURSELF to hold fast to knowing your truth and loving yourself well.
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How would it change the energy of your interactions if you trusted yourself as the foremost expert on YOU?
Your Voice:
Your ability to speak your truth with certainty.
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How different would your life be if you were able to say yes, no, ask for what you need and want... say all the things you want to, and none of the things you don't?
Peace:
Your center of security and calmness that comes when you are in alignment; all parts of you coexisting in perfect harmony.
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How would it change the way you navigate the "hard times" if you knew how to get back to your center of peace?
Raising the Bar:
Your commitment to yourself to not make yourself smaller, or settle for less than your heart's desire.
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What changes would you make in your life if you stopped making concessions, and raised the bar to where you will find true joy?
Freedom:
Your ability to live no longer confined by the power of another.
How different would life be if you were free of the burdens you've carried? How would it impact the way you walk, talk, love, sing, dance...?
What would if feel like if your baseline was the freedom that comes from knowing, loving, and trusting yourself? ​​​
Y.B.
"Coach Sarah was instrumental in helping me find calmness in the craziest moments through her knowledge, concrete strategies, and professional care. I felt seen and understood by her in every step of my journey. Most importantly, I felt safe - safe sharing my deepest pain with her and safe exposing the ugliness of my betrayal story in order to find healing and empowerment."
J.O.
"Sarah has been instrumental in my healing journey. She has been a guide, a cheerleader, an empathizer and more! She has helped me tap into my true self and live out of my own core values."
R.G.E.
"Let's face it: The topic of gaslighting isn't child's play - it takes a true expert to break through the drama, legitimize the trauma, then champion for the triumph of those seeking to "turn off the gas." Sarah is that expert. She knows her material inside and out, and she teaches it with the compassion and conviction of an intimate friend. I left Sarah's workshop with both immediate and unforgettable takeaways. Then, within weeks, I used those tools to execute meaningful change within my marriage. Worth every penny - including the flight from CA to TX!"